After our Christmas Eve morning at my parents’ house, we drove down to Louisville, Kentucky to spend the next couple days with my dad’s family. Matt’s favorite part of the whole trip happened in the evening of Christmas Day, when he got to have a Nerf gun war with two five-year-old boys in my aunt’s basement.
But seriously, watch out for my little cousin Christopher: he will bust a Nerf cap in yo’ ass. Maybe in another 20 years he’ll be Special Agent Christopher with the FBI.
From December 23-28, we had four Christmases in four different states.
Christmas #1 was spent in Ohio at my parents’ house. We decided my brother was going to get a tattoo of a dinosaur wearing the One Ring from Lord of the Rings… but then we figured out that he already HAD the tattoo: you just can’t see it right now, because the dinosaur is invisible. DUH.
Earlier this month was Corby’s first birthday.
Joy.
Corby is one cute puppy… I mean, dog.
Aw, go on.
He frequently asks to have his ears scratched by looking adorably piteous.
I mean, how could you resist?
Sometimes he feels like he’s not getting quite 100% of your attention.
HI, I'M RIGHT HERE, SEE ME?!
Sometimes he’s happy simply to chill on the couch and gaze into your eyes.
You're pretty.
Those are the moments I like to remind him that he’s a full year old–his age is no longer measured in months. He’s practically a senior citizen. He might need to get softer bones to chew on soon, to prevent his dentures falling out.
Holy crap.
(Tee hee.)
Dudes.
(When I say, “dudes,” I mean, “all you people reading this, whether of the male or female variety.” Just so we’re clear.)
Dudes. You want to make this cake. It’s super easy, it looks kinda fancy, and since it includes two of my favorite baking ingredients (cinnamon and ginger!), it’s totally delicious and festive. Perfect for holiday parties. It even contains a little booze!
I found this recipe in a cookbook called, “The Boozy Baker,” by Lucy Baker. I was looking for a cake recipe that was a little unusual but still appropriate for the holiday season, and her Plum Biercake fit the bill perfectly. The cake itself is basically fluffed-up gingerbread, and the plums add a nice complementary texture and flavor.
The only change I made was to add a white-chocolate drizzle to the top of the cake. My insatiable sweet-tooth is often a curse… but Matt and I agreed after our third helpings that the icing was definitely a good idea this time!
[Obligatory paragraph about how I'm sorry I haven't posted in FOR-EV-ER and about how there's probably no one reading at this point anyway and about how I feel guilty but life is so blah blah blah...]
Good, that’s over. No one likes a whiner! (Wait, why am I starting this up again?)
Here are some random things on today’s theme: house & furniture.
I am currently the Queen of Getting Things Cheap, but that has come with some unexpected problems.
First, and the only problem-free item: I got a free nativity set from a co-worker who was reducing her collection from 10,000 to 80. (Well, I’m pretty sure I saw at least 8 in her house, so…)
I also got a beautiful cedar storage chest/bench that is in really excellent condition from Craigslist for $40… and which Corby has already chewed on.
The best one: I found a fabulous, enormous, 12-drawer solid-wood dresser that would be perfect as a replacement for Matt’s old dresser that is falling apart. The Craigslist seller and I agreed on a price (I totally won that deal). It’s in great condition. We got it to the house courtesy of a friend’s pick-up. So far, so good, right? But it turns out that the freaking monster dresser won’t fit up our narrow, twisty staircase. The dresser is currently standing on its side in the middle of our freaking living room with all of the drawers pulled out and stacked in piles next to it. And it’s 6 feet tall when standing sideways like that, so it’s totally not in the way of EVERYTHING, no, not at all.
2. Guess what else is in the living room? All the stuff from our still-not-finished dining room! Hey, home renovation is hard when you both work full time and are kind of lazy. (That’s a good excuse, right?) We’re getting close, though… we even have some art to hang on the not-quite-painted-but-all-erected walls. We planned to finish by Thanksgiving… then Christmas… now maybe New Year’s? Pictures will be posted of the final outcome sometime in 2012, but I can’t be more specific than that.
Somewhere out there, there is a guy whose name is similar to my maiden name. This guy gave his grandmother my email address instead of his own. I would call him a moron, but considering the things I’ve received from her, it’s probably on purpose.
To date, I have received 12 emails from “Grandma F.” Eleven of the twelve have been email forwards; the 12th was an e-card (wheee!). Of the eleven email forwards, about two have been cutesy, “Remember, life is good! Look at these babies in funny outfits! Now forward this to four trillion people, and you will find your true love on Tuesday at 11:11am unless you tie your shoes the wrong way!” emails. Everyone’s favorite!
Sadly, the rest of the emails have been even WORSE. Most of them attack Democrats or the President in various reality-defying ways. Today I got a doozy, which declared that President Obama doesn’t like the national anthem because of the bombs it refers to, and that he wants to change the national anthem to “I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing,” (and this email was OH SO EARNEST) and then align our policies as much as possible with the Middle East. Another email was about how no one should eat halal meats because Islamic meat factories fail health inspections.
Nothing like good, old-fashioned Islamophobia, am I right?!
Today I finally reached my limit, and I abandoned my previous recourse of responding with “Please stop sending me these. You have the wrong email address. I am not your grandchild. Sincerely, Jessica.” Instead, I composed her a new email.
“Dear Ms. F,
I am not your grandchild. I have a Grandma X*, and a Grandma Y*, but no Grandma F. You have the wrong email address for your grandchild. This is my email address, and I don’t know you.
PLEASE REMOVE ME FROM YOUR CONTACT LIST. I do not want to receive any more email forwards containing ridiculous libel against the President that could be proven false with the tiniest bit of internet research. No one likes email forwards, anyway.
Please reconsider your email habits and use your internet access for good instead of evil.
Sincerely,
Jessica”
Here’s hoping that one gets through. My past four emails didn’t do a thing. It’s getting to the point where every time I see a new email from her, I think, “Grandma F can go F herself.” It’s just so convenient an insult! But then I regret that thought because she’s probably some crotchety old lady who could whoop my ass with her cane.
*Names have been changed to protect the elderly.
